Unless you live in a cave (or just happen to not care about America's Next Top Model…which is more likely the truth), you probably know that Jaslene was named winner of ANTM last night. Now the world will have to put up with Miss ChaCha Diva herself for an entire year. Anyway, here's what you missed or just want to relive:
Cover Girl Shoot and Commercial
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It's down to the bottom three: Jaslene, Natasha and Renee. The girls are told they will be shooting their Cover Girl ads, as well as a commercial--one of those cheesy "My life as a Cover Girl" things. Caridee comes onboard to help the girls as they take their photos, while Jay coaches the girls through their commercial, which has no lines; it's entirely ad-lib.
Everyone does OK. Nothing too special. However, we learn that it's hard to smile for long periods of time. Did you notice Jaslene's cheek exercises? (Maybe that's what gave her the edge?) And during this shoot, it's the first time that we hear that Renee looks "old." Do you think the judges could have mentioned this before? But then again, 21 is just one step away from the nursing home…
I think the best comment to come out of this segment was from Renee who said Natasha looked like, "a pigeon-toed duck with a poop hanging out of her ass." Nice. Classy.
The Final Two
At elimination time, Renee's "oldness" is brought up once more and she is sent packing. She looked like she got run over by a truck when Tyra delivers the news. Personally, I'm happy. Natasha's optimism is growing on me and I'm beginning to love her broken English.
Next, Jaslene and Natasha head to their Seventeen cover shoot. Jaslene makes the comment that if "Natasha wins [she] will pull out all her hair." Ouch! After the shoot, the girls arrive home to have their one-on-one with Tyra. BORING.
Hitting the Runway
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This is it! Jaslene and Natasha arrive at the space where the runway show will happen. It's a platform raised up at least five feet and built out of uneven planks. Jay tells them that the theme of the show is "evolution," however as the show progresses it's clear that the theme goes out the window.
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The girls each model three outfits. The first being a loin cloth that looks like they had two pieces of fabric draped on them. UGLY. During the second outfit, Natasha's skirt falls off but she handles it like a pro and keeps on walking. And for the last outfit, you get a nice show of Jaslene's chest bones. Oh that's attractive.
Top Model?
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It's elimination and I desperately wanted Natasha to win. The girls walk out holding hands, which is RIDICULOUS since they obviously don't like each other. After reviewing all their work, Jaslene is announced as the winner. Natasha seems sincerely happy for her and we get to watch Jaslene jump up and down screaming.
I'm happy for her, but damn, she really needs to gain some weight! I'm sure that adolescent girls who happen to read Seventeen won't be affected by another too-skinny model. Riiiight.
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Anyway, I want to know what you thought. Also, I'll be interviewing Jaslene next week, so send your questions in. Thanks!
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